Blogs # 4, 5, 6

The last few weeks we spent with the Mbuyis were a wonderful experience. We not only got to know them better as a family, but we got to share a little bit of our culture through activities and a little travel near the end. Here are our collected final experiences!

Visit #3-March 26: Cards & Memorization

Short on ideas for entertainment, me and Logan decided something a little mind-challenging would be fun to bring to the Mbuyis' house, in the form of a pack of playing cards.

Upon arriving, we recieved a happy bit of news: Seraphin has recently found work in a packaging warehouse thanks to the networking community of his church, and the job is expected to pay relatively well.

Our first game was card war, which was simply using card hierarchy to see which one could win. On beginner's luck, Carmel remarkably won three straight games against me and Logan, to our amusement. I think this luck will help her be more enthusiastic to try more American games based on the experience.

However, it was our second card game that truly impressed me. In a game of match, we had a whole group of cards turned upside down, leaving Carmel and Seraphin to find matches. Surprisingly, Carmel again displayed a remarkable intution and selection towards which cards were located where she needed them. She ended up winning again against us boys, to our amazement. I wonder whether her enthusiasm is what helped her memory easily adapt to the new challenge, or whether she has always had inherent selection abilities. I know that she's been playing plenty of learning games on her electronics, and I decided I wanted to try this again with another game the next time.

Vist #4-March 31: Headbandz and Identification

Our next visit, me and Logan decided to bring something fun to do with the family. Quickly stopping by Wallgreens' Pharmacy, we picked out an interactive game called Headbanz. The game is basically attaching a plastic blue headband around your head, and selecting an unknown card to place in a slot on your forehead, allowing others' clues to help you guess the answer. We also brought Easter-themed candy like M&M's and Gummi Worms.

Thankfully, all of the kids were home tonight, as their parents were busy. We set down immediately to start playing the game. During the game, we found ourselves trying hard to help give each other additional clues outside spoken semantic ones to help them guess their answers, such as gestural or heptic touches to help illustrate the object and/or animal that was their card.

I feel like not only did we help introduce the kids to a new method of elimination and selection in terms of grouping, we also learned how in touch they are with our language's connotations, even beyond that of just names. Landry was one of the highest scorers in the game, and I have to wonder whether his avid interest in learning helps with his international translation. For our next visit, I agreed with Logan that it had to be something outside of their home, one that would help them learn more about our culture by activity.

Visit #5-April 4th: "Noah" and Post Service Assessment

Our final visit started off a little nerve-wracking. We had previously tried to set up a time to visit the Mbuyis on Thursday, but their schedules prevented us from properly getting to hang out with the family, so we elected to wait until the next day. When we showed up, we found the house was empty at the time we planned on meeting. After a few minutes from a quick phone call, we found that they were just running late. Upon their arrival, me, Logan, and the kids decided to go see the blockbuster "Noah", due to its religious themes and the nearest convenient showing coming up relatively soon.

During our ride over, we learned that the Mbuyi kids (Camel, Luwara, and Landry) had done very little traveling since arriving at the Quad Cities, but that this was their second movie outing, aside from the one with their church.

During the movie, some graphic content and heavy scenes started to make me wonder whether we had chosen something that was too intense. I looked over at Carmel several times, but she seemed strangely entranced by the movie, even as its themes and characters got darker. I think their connection with family made them especially interested in Noah's portrayed family, as we discussed the conveyed relationship messages of equality and justice that he displayed towards his sons differently throughout the movie afterwards.

At the end of the movie, we cheerfully yet exhaustedly drove the Mbuyis home, dropped them off, and said goodnight to their parents, thanking them again for their kindness and welcoming nature. I dearly hope that we'll be able to visit them again in the future.

ASSESSMENT

At the end of this experience, I can definitely draw out some specific traits about our visits that made the experience an educational one on both ends:

For one, the visits always had a high level of competence: the Mbuyis had a very quiet social life since moving to the Quad Cities, but it was one that was rich with interaction and international learning. They were always welcoming to anyone who showed up at their door, and respected our suggestions and activities with full acceptance. Not only that, but even when they displayed forms of misunderstanding some of our terms and speech, they used humor to convey their perspective, as I learned when I found myself baffled to remember my high school French education towards Seraphins' fluent speech.

Furthermore, we found ourselves constantly practicing active and interactive strategies to get a feel for the Mbuyis' home life. As one or two family members were often busy during the times of our visits, we had to do a little background check on the boys from Seraphin in order to find out more about them, since they couldn't be here most of the time. However, our interactive discussions helped us learn more about the Mbuyis' beliefs, interests, and skillsets they had acquired since moving over here.

Our last major theme would have to be that of ethnocentric connection. During our visits, we found we had more to relate to the Mbuyis than we initially thought. They shared a wealth of knowledge about their surroundings and terms in the five months they've been here. They share a distinctly Midwestern faith, friendly demeanor, and sense of adventure in all that they do.

I feel that this experience has made me want to continue seeking out opportunities with the World Relief Program, especially considering the wonderful experience I have had throughout these past months. It also makes me wonder about what kinds of friendships I could forge through the International program here at Ambrose, based on the things we may or may not have in common. But if there's anything valuable the Mbuyis have helped teach me...it's that it's never too late to ask.

Blog #3-March 20th

Our 2nd visit to the Mbuyis was an encouraging evening that really made me feel good about our continuing project. This particular evening, we found ourselves greeted by not only the brothers, Landry and Gloire, but also another residential mother, Heather, who was holding the newest addition, baby Patrick. The father (Seraphin) kindly informed us that they were going to wait on letting other families handle him, as he was still too young for that. I got a clear sense of the nurturing going into Patrick's life already, especially after Seraphin informed us that the baby was named after their local pastor, and his middle name (Luwara) a Congo word meaning kindness. I felt that at this stage in the culture shock process, they seemed to have moved well past the mental isolation and into integration. Even their television finally got updated to digital, which will hopefully allow for them to have a wide range of news and entertainment to continue this process.

During this visit, I also got to learn more about the Mbuyis' traditions and culture. I brought along my Reader's Digest jokebook, and pointed out a particularly funny comic involving a scarecrow. This invoked Seraphin to share interesting facts about the agriculture in their homeland, and that his paternal grandfather was chief of the village. With this, I had to wonder whether Seraphin and his family had inherited any special duties from his lineage, but I felt it inappropriate to ask just then. They did tell me that they had no special heirlooms passed down to them, which I found saddening.

However, our intracultural discussion on the subject of faith was very encouraging. Seraphin detailed his life philosophy as God returning to you for what you put into the earth, much like planting a tomato in a garden. Kindness returns kindness, and hope returns hope. Lately, I've been feeling burdened with the weight of my stunted choices, so this was a wonderfully welcome pep talk.

After these two visits, I'm really getting to feel the warmth of the Mbuyis' lifestyle, even now. They seem not to care whether their identities are avowed by what they have or ascribed by what they've inherited. They seem to really want to focus on having a peaceful home life, being good neighbors, and being good people.

Next time, I would love the opportunity to go with them to a restaurant or show them a new family-friendly place in town on our side of the bridge, with their permission. I also want to help Landry out with finding a great writing scholarship to help his academic goals.

World Relief Blog #1-2 Preconceptions and our First Visit

After several weeks of deliberation, our group, consisting of me, Logan, and Donald finally elected for visiting the Mbuyi family on Friday, February 28th. Since it was over in Rock Island, we agreed upon trusting Logan for transportation over the bridge.

My personal ambitions for this project were initially geared towards merely making sure that we learned as much as we could about their culture, and could show the best qualities of ours. I assumed the learning site would be in a larger building like a community center or a local church, in case domestic issues were currently difficult. I knew that the population the Mbuyis came from was significantly large, so I expected them to be relatively friendly and open to discussion. I intended initially to focus on expanding cultural knowledge on both ends so as to increase both our learning.

I found many of these expectations debunked that afternoon, as we pulled up to their suburban neighborhood in the Rock Island area. The house was on a nice street corner, and there were two entrances from the front and back (we had initial trouble deciphering which one was which). We elected for the one on the left, and found ourselves greeted by a young African American boy in a blue jacket.

I immediately started to take my shoes off, not wanting to muddy their fresh carpet. To my surprise, the family insisted I keep them on if I wanted. I decided for simply putting them in a corner where no one could trip over them.

The Mbuyi's house had very nice accommodations. A floral painting resided in the back corner of the living room, which was garnered with a Barbie playlet, where their daughter Carmel played with her toys, and a television which currently they can't watch properly, on account of them needing to switch to digital. I found it fascinating, as we discussed further, how many accommodations had been made for the family not only in getting over to the United States, but also in their domestic settlings.

The Mbuyi's struggle in securing certification as they detailed it to us, is one I find a familiar situation in all forms of immigration. The fact that the father, Seraphin, is currently transitioning from his job as a driver back home to becoming an educated man, while his pregnant wife is also trying to help secure an educational future for her oldest son, Landry, gave me a clearer perspective on how the family is living. It makes me wonder how long the Mbuyis shall have to live on welfare before finding a lifestyle of sustainability for themselves.

At the conclusion of our visit, and drawing a picture for Carmel, who is still transitioning to English language, I left the house with not only uplifted spirits, but also a clearer mission for what I want to do: I wish to keep introducing myself and the Mbuyis to new culture, but now I also want to fulfill some sort of personal need in their lives. I want them to be able to feel loved by their neighbors, and protected by their faith.

I believe the next time we visit, I'd love to be prepared to participate in a pastime the family is fond of to spend more time together. We can also look around for potential scholarships for Seraphin/Landry's educational needs. I'll also be aware of the shoe policy they've kindly implemented.

Interfaith Marriages & Cultural Difference.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBW7wtIgMWE

This video, inspired by Chelsea Clinton's upcoming marriage to her Jewish fiancee, had me thinking seriously about the issue of interfaith relationships. As the video comfirms, the key aspects to making a successful cross-culture relationship work include: compromise, discussion, and carrying out the agreements, especially when others like children or relatives become involved. I believe that as long as the woman I'm with can accept my religion, as well as my suggestions for incorporating that into our personal lives, then we've already cleared a very difficult step. As it is, I'm currently getting to know a liberal girl who, while being very politically outspoken, is also enthusiastic, kind, and encouraging towards me in everything else. I wouldn't give up what I consider to be essential to my well-being, but I wouldn't enforce it on her either.

I think that knowing a person's culture before visiting can be a helpful tool for subtle communication and domestic respect. As Dave Stacey learned in 30 Days, his research of Muslim culture helped him not only to blend in, but also to befriend the people he was visiting, and even leave a bit of an influence on them as well. However, I also believe it's important not to rely on cultural generalizations as a means of discussion. For one thing, it presses a characterisitic onto them they may not necessarily have themselves. And they might also be ashamed or take national issues very seriously if they are brought up. It's best to wait until a cross-cultural friendship has really bloomed in order to bring forth such discussion.

Prejudice & Perception-2/19/14

As human beings, we try to train ourselves to stick to an "open-minded" doctrine for all beliefs and opinions we believe to be morally sound. However, when prejudice either against a person or a set of ideals gets in the way, it can lead to unfair treatment of the person and disregard for their logic. Recently, a blogger named Dani Coleman did an in-depth analysis of her dislike of the film "Frozen" for specific scenes and media praise that contrasted with her past observations. Immediately, a swarm of conversation sprung up: some from people who respected her approach and alternatively voiced their agreement/disagreement, while some, who believed the film was a progressive approach, voiced very strongly worded rebuttals which accused her of overanalyzing and stepping on progressive portrayals by Disney.

Coleman's review:https://medium.com/disney-and-animation/7c0bbc7252ef

My perception of different occupations depends on the things I like to do in a workspace. I do love art and theatre, being both my majors, and I'm endeavoring to ensure that I am able to find a profession that combines both of these aspects as much as possible. (specifically animation) At this stage, I find myself in an analytical learning point, where I am discovering how to be effective before being busy in the workplace.

So…I'm on Blogger now! (Entry 1, Uno, Un)

Salutations, everybody!

In case the above greeting threw you off, it's just a fancy way of saying hello. I picked it up from Charlotte's Web, and it just kinda stuck on me. :D

But yeah, the main reason I've started this blog is because I'm going to be using it for my Interpersonal Communications course, and commenting on the work I'll be doing with the refugees in our area.

My personal response as to how service pertains to learning is based upon the level of how much you are able to do. Service is generally outlined as an organized endeavor towards a particular need in the community that needs to be filled, but anyone can do this for hours or personal credit. To effectively give, and thus effectively learn, I think there should always be investment on the behalf of a helper in the well-being or positive repercussions of whom or what they're turning their attention towards. This allows them to assess another person's place in life, and what kind of life has led to them being in the place they are now. We all want success, but sometimes we stay so focused on our own orbit of productivity (or lack of) that we end up shutting out crucial opportunities to learn about the world we're trying to make our place in. Service is just life's way of saying, "I just need a little bit of effort from you today…see what you get out of it."

So, that educational anecdote aside, I'll try to put some fun stuff up on here every now and then, such as YouTube uploads, fitness goals, drawings, and whatever else I'm up to! Catch you later!